Zeus: whoa look at dat ass I need to tap that
Everybody else: Zeus. ZEUS NO.
Zeus: lol too late *changes into something weird and fucks maiden*
Maiden’s dad (king): FFFFFFUUUUU-
Hera: ZEUS WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THAT *fucks up the life of demigod and his/her mom*
I hate Zeus so fucking much.
Anyone with sense does which is why I’m going to tell you one of my favourite myths involving him.
There was this girl called Sinope, pretty as a peach, lovely and virginal and virtuous and smart and shit.
Zeus wanted (unsurprisingly) to bang her.
Because he wants her so much he promises to grant her any one wish.
She wishes - and this is the best part - she wishes to remain a virgin.